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View Full Version : 2012 Cruise Special -- This is not Spam!!! LMFAO!!



CrzyChinook
03-07-2012, 04:35
got this from a friend today ...had to share!!

















http://us.mg6.mail.yahoo.com/ya/download?mid=1%5f599724%5fANfSi2IAADZtT1dGlAY7lXMFj3k&pid=2.2&fid=Inbox&inline=1&appid=YahooMailNeo









































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L u x u r y C r u i s e L i n e s








Now Accepting Reservations! Additional cruise information available below.












To The Point Cruise Lines is excited to offer the ultimate adventure cruise,
along the pirate-infested coast of Somalia









Ultimate Adventure Cruise Route



Rates and Availability



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Ship Name


Starting Price




Days

Availability




Sun Splendor


$5,200.00




5

Fully Booked




Grand Voyage


$6,150.00




7

Reservations Available




Horizons IV


$7,091.00




10

Reservations Available




Horizons III


$5,200.00




7

Fully Booked




Grand Voyage II


$6,300.00




7

Fully Booked




Grand Voyage III


$5,200.00




5

Reservations Available




Coastal Paradise


$5,200.00




7

Reservations Available




Coastal Paradise II


$8,200.00




10

Reservations Available




Peril Princess


$5,200.00




7

Fully Booked




Peril Princess II


$5,200.00




7

Reservations Available














We board our luxury cruise ships in Djibouti on the Gulf of Aden near the entrance to the Red Sea,
and disembark in Mombasa Kenya , seven adrenaline-charged days later.
Reservations start at only $5,200 per-person (double occupancy, inside room)
and $6,900 (verandah complete with bench rest).








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You'll relax like never before!





That's because you are welcome to bring
your own arsenal with you.
If you don't have your own weapons, you can rent them from our onboard Master Gunsmith.


Enjoy reloading parties every afternoon,
with skeet and marksmanship competitions every night!


But the best fun of all, of course, is...











...Pirate Target Practice!







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The object of our cruise is to sail up and down the Somali Coast waiting to get hijacked by pirates!






Weapons rentals:












Weapon Selection




Price

Description




AK-47 Light Assaulthttp://us.mg6.mail.yahoo.com/ya/download?mid=1%5f599724%5fANfSi2IAADZtT1dGlAY7lXMFj3k&pid=2.8&fid=Inbox&inline=1&appid=YahooMailNeo




$12.00
Per Day

On a budget? Rent a full-auto scope-mounted AK-47 for only $9/day
with 7.62 ball ammo at $12 per 100 rounds:




M-16 Full Automatichttp://us.mg6.mail.yahoo.com/ya/download?mid=1%5f599724%5fANfSi2IAADZtT1dGlAY7lXMFj3k&pid=2.9&fid=Inbox&inline=1&appid=YahooMailNeo




$25.00
Per Day

Rent a full auto M-16 for only $25/day with ammo
attractively priced at $16 per 100 rounds of 5.56 armor-piercing:




Barrett M-107 50 Caliberhttp://us.mg6.mail.yahoo.com/ya/download?mid=1%5f599724%5fANfSi2IAADZtT1dGlAY7lXMFj3k&pid=2.10&fid=Inbox&inline=1&appid=YahooMailNeo




$59.00
Per Day

Hello! Nothing gets a pirate's attention like a Barrett M-107 50-cal rifle; only $59/day with 25 rounds of armor-piercing ammo
affordably priced at only $29.95.




RPG Launcherhttp://us.mg6.mail.yahoo.com/ya/download?mid=1%5f599724%5fANfSi2IAADZtT1dGlAY7lXMFj3k&pid=2.11&fid=Inbox&inline=1&appid=YahooMailNeo




$175.00
Per Day

Want to make a real impact? Rent an RPG for only $175/day
with three fragmentation rounds included!
A true favorite among pirates, rent one today and show you care!
























Customer Testimonials





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"Six attacks in 4 days were more than I expected. I bagged three pirates, my wife nailed two,
and my 12-year old son sank two boats with the mini-gun.
This wonderful cruise was fun for the whole family"-- Fred D., Cincinnati , OH





"Pirates 0, Passengers 32! Well worth the trip! Can't recommend it highly enough!" -- Ben L., Bethesda , MD





BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE!
Twin mounted mini-guns are available for rental
at only $450.00 per 30 seconds of sustained fire!

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Additional Cruise Line Services






Need a spotter? Our professional crew members can double as spotters for only $30/hour (spotting scope included, but gratuities are not).
Also included: Free complimentary night vision equipment --and throughout the night, coffee, pastries and snacks are always available on the main deck from 7pm until 6am.
Our deluxe package comes complete with gourmet meals and all rooms offer a mini-bar.






OUR SATISFACTION GUARANTEED!






















We guarantee you will experience at least two hijacking attempts by pirates or you'll receive an instant $1,000 refund upon arrival in Mombasa .

How can we make that guarantee? We operate at 5 knots just beyond 12 nautical miles off the coast of Somalia, thus in international waters where pirates have no rights whatever.


In fact, we make three passes through the area's most treacherous waters to ensure maximum visibility by Somali mother ships.


We repeat this for five days, making three complete passes past the entire Somali Coast...At night, the boat is fully lit and bottle rockets are shot every five minutes, with loud disco music directionally beamed shore side to attract maximum attention.





ACT NOW!



Cabin space is limited so you need to respond quickly. Reserve your package before Aug 31st and get a great bonus--
100 rounds of free tracer ammo in the caliber of your choice! So sign up for the Ultimate Somali Coast Adventure Cruise now!









BUT THERE'S EVEN MORE!







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Reserve Now -and be automatically entered to win a 5 minute time slot on the Captain's own Twin Browning 50 Caliber M2HB installation!

"I haven't had this much fun since flying choppers in ' Nam . Don't worry about getting shot by pirates...
they never even got close to the ship with the crap they shoot and their lousy aim...
Come on board and bag your own clutch of genuine Somali pirates!"
-- Mike W., Savannah , GA

"Holy crap! I mean literally, I crapped myself!
This gun shook the deck like thunder, and I was laughing so hard I just had to release it.
AWESOME!-- Jim W., Tampa , FL

Rickety Rob
03-07-2012, 05:09
Break out your credit cards fellas....Big $$$$$ to ride this girl...hahaha!

Twizted875
03-07-2012, 11:00
Haha no shit cruises are cheaper now... There have been many major problems on cruise ships... they have to do something to save the cruise market.... we were discussing this in my economics class the other day... the cruise ship market is sinking like a rock...

RogueScot
03-07-2012, 15:45
Free drinks? Food? No mention? They'll get me on the alcohol. :)

Twizted875
03-07-2012, 17:57
Lmao I just now got around to reading the whole thing holy shit!!! Hahah I'll take some mini gun time.....

DaddyDietrich
03-09-2012, 22:26
Well if anyone on the site have a boat hell im sure got enough folks with our own shit we can all take the ride USMG style.

Twizted875
03-09-2012, 23:12
Ya I was thinking of posting some pics of my "babies"