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  1. #1
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    The EPIC USMG Yarn

    Add a sentence to the story to keep it going. End your post with and ellipsis(...). Let's see where this puppy leads. Don't disrupt the flow and refrain from editing unless it disrupts the flow. Also, don't worry about voice or try to be an English professor. I'll start:
    Johnny was just your average teenager who pondered what could be as he lumbered through the mean city streets. He hears a loud bang and turns the corner to find...

  2. #2
    USMG [Retired Staff] Member
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    a helpless woman who is being chased by 2 guys. The poor woman was so exhausted that she ran into the side of a dumpster. Johnny, unfortunately is a selfish teenager who is a member of the Cobra Kai. After a brief flashback to his fight with Daniel.........




  3. #3
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    and all the Army Special Forces training that Sensei Kreese taught him. Johnny then got a sudden burst of adrenaline and runs to the aide of the women. He noticed that the womens clothing was tore and that she was bleeding from a few cuts ......

  4. #4
    Silent but Deadly....
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    And he couldn't resist his sparkly vampire urges and thirst for blood, so he called up his good wolf friend froto and froto told him to...
    http://forums.usmilitarygamers.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=3616&d=1341691069

    Silent But Deadly!

  5. #5
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    cut the bullshit and WATCH OUT! Johnny dodged the dropkick in the nick of time and swept the leg of one of the assailants. He thanked God for imaginiary friends...

  6. #6
    USMG [Retired Staff] Member
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    And suddenly dies of a heart attack...


  7. #7
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    from the sheer awesomeness of seeing that the woman he helped is Jessica Alba. Lucky for him she knows CPR and resucitates Johnny. Johnny comes to in a hospital bed which is surrounded by...

  8. #8
    USMG [Retired Staff] Member
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    Crying and farting old ladies who give Johnny a big...
    "Be polite, be professional, but have a plan to kill everybody you meet." -General Mattis

  9. #9
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    hot karl, after vomiting for a while he...

  10. #10
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    stumbles into the hall with the back of his gown flapping open. He realizes he has nothing on underneath. Just then a hot nurse rounds the corner...

  11. #11
    USMG [Retired Staff] Member
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    and starts laughing at the Sver tattoo on his right cheek. He makes her swear to The Lord our God not to tell anyone. Just as she agrees, he lets a Silent Fart........




  12. #12
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    out which draws her to him like one of those Axe bodywash commercials. More and more patients scramble to him as they get whifs of the aroma and...

  13. #13
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    start clinging to his legs, latching on his arms, wrapping around his waist, and pulling him down. Suddenly out of nowhere Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks the mass of mindless patients. Bodies fly in every direction as Johnny gasps for breath. Chuck picks him up and says...

    Gaming is staying up 'til 3am to earn a trophy that isn't real.......BUT IS

  14. #14
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    "Johnny my young lad, You haven't been using your Total Gym I gave you lately." "Have You"? ......

  15. #15
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    No I haven't had time because I have been to busy catching up on my Texas Ranger episodes...
    "Be polite, be professional, but have a plan to kill everybody you meet." -General Mattis

  16. #16
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    This answer pleases Chuck. He releases John who then recovers his clothes and returns home. John sees his front door ajar and opens it to find...

  17. #17
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    Bob saget, painting the walls with the blood of johnnys enemies...

  18. #18
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    John asks Bob Saget with the utmost sincerity, "What is this?!". Bob promptly replies,"The Aristocrats!" John then...

  19. #19
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    was confused and still a little shocked by this very strange act. "......why?" he asked, in a very puzzled tone. Bob seemed annoyed at this point, being interrupted in his painting yet again. "because Bob Ross was not available to do it, because he is.....

    Gaming is staying up 'til 3am to earn a trophy that isn't real.......BUT IS

  20. #20
    Airborne Recon Gy-reen Rexasaurus
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    In the Caribbean, playing hop scotch."
    Johnny, now emotionally distraught by the actions of Mr. Saget, and the knowledge of Mr. Ross playing hop scotch, turns to run out the door, strips his clothes off and run through the streets naked. Screaming "Why did you do this to me god?" Suddenly he hears tires screeching and sees.....

    Signature thanks to jgreco138

  21. #21
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    a pimped out Fed Ex truck. The truck comes to a halt and some guy hops out with what appears to be the future battle armour. The guy raises a state of the art weapon to his shoulder and starts unloading into the tops of the trees. Then all of a sudden Johnny hears the guys yelling "Die Mother F'ers Die". Johnny then begins to........

  22. #22
    USMG Beer & Boob Judge
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    draw back his hands as if to produce a fireball, ala Street Fighter characters. He releases the fireball with such ferocity that the enemies soon find themselves...

    Indecision may or may not be my problem.

  23. #23
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    engulfed in flames cuz that's what happens when you get hit by a motherfucking fireball! With enemies defeated Johnny returns to the pimped out truck to find...

  24. #24
    USMG Beer & Boob Judge
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    two tickets to Margaritaville on the front seat. Johnny decides to go get his woman to take with him, but not before he...

    Indecision may or may not be my problem.

  25. #25
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    Re: The Great USMG Yarn

    Drinks a 12 pack of Budweiser, now completely inebriated, he decides to....

    Signature thanks to jgreco138

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